Here we go again. As summer comes around Mothership is desperately trying to persuade me to get involved in some kind of mindless occupation while she dashes off to Tesco to indulge herself. Typical!! How can I make her see that I would be far happier just lolling around in the – ahem – sunshine, or loitering with intent around town? This summer I am putting my foot down with a firm hand – no more Jacobean embroidery or beginner’s tree surgery for me! I will resist all her attempts to nonchalantly steer me towards those damned brochures and just play it cool. Yes. She’ll never succeed!
Be prepared … July 18, 2007
So – the summer holidays are almost upon us. And I am NOT going to get caught out like last year, with Tiny mooning round the house creating ever more elaborate diversions to get me away from the computer so she could sneak in and carry on creating her Sims empire. I’ve no idea how much she paid Animal to lock himself in his wardrobe like that. Maybe she simply lured him in there with a trail of salted popcorn. But, anyway, it took me ages to get him out by which time she was so firmly ensconced in Veronaville with the Capulet family, I didn’t have the heart to turf her off. And I suppose, in a way, it’s educational – isn’t it? With all those Shakespearean references and, obviously, it’s very creative.
It’s a different matter, though, with Tracy Beaker on the telly. There’s nothing at all there I’d like either of them to emulate. Animal did once say wistfully, though, that living in a children’s home didn’t look so bad, because at least they had TVs in their rooms. But that was a few years ago – before he started to communicate solely in grunts.
Anyway, Animal has amazed us all and signed himself up for all kinds of improving activities: athletics in the first week, Rock School in the second. I forget what’s in store after that. Canoeing, I think. But Tiny has, so far, resisted all temptation – and I know she’ll enjoy doing something, once she gets stuck in. So I’ve been very clever and got loads of brochures and forms and info, and I’m going to leave them round the house. Sort of casually. Wait until she sees what’s on offer. Fashion, pottery, athletics, dance, chamber orchestra, stage make-up. There’s got to be something there to tempt her. I’ll just act all cool. Let her come to me this time, and then I’ll enroll her quick before she has a chance to change her mind. Perhaps one of her mates would like to go along too. I’ll ask the girls at coffee on Thursday. I know they’ll be as desperate to get their kids constructively entertained as I am so we can exchange intelligence. Maybe mount a campaign. Hmmm. I think I’ll make a list.